I didn’t mean for it to be a big declaration. I didn’t mean to say it at all. I’ve barely come to the realization myself, so I shouldn’t be making grand announcements.
The moment I say it, though, it feels like the air gets sucked out of the room. Chris goes deathly silent.
The clock on the wall ticks.
“Are you gonna say something?” I ask when I can’t take his silence any longer.
“I will. As soon as I figure out what the f**k to say.”
“It wasn’t something I could control.”
“Actually, it was,” he says, sounding angrier than I’ve heard in quite some time. “It was the very f*****g definition of something you could control, Jessa. If you’d returned his f*****g phone at the beginning, this could have been avoided. In fact, if you’d just declined his offer to work on his boat like a normal
