#3 - I Want You Here

Lara I was pathetic. I gripped the edge of the sink and stared at my reflection. The woman looking back at me barely resembled who I used to be. Mascara I'd just applied minutes ago had already smeared, dark streaks bleeding down my face as the tears refused to stop. No matter how many times I wiped them away... more came. They wouldn't stop. Neither could I. All I could see where moments I'd dreamed of. The smiles, the joy... everything I'd hoped I'd get to feel one day when I brought a baby into this world. It was supposed to be mine. Mine and Liam's. Instead, he was out there... living that dream with someone else. I let out a shaky breath, dabbing uselessly at my eyes. A soft knock sounded on the bedroom door. "Lara? May I come in?" And there was the other reason I couldn't stop crying. Lucian had been kind enough to let me stay. And I'd woken up practically wrapped around him, clinging like I had nowhere else to go. He didn't say it, but I'd made him uncomfortable in his own home. I burned with embarrassment at the memory of begging him to stay when he carried me to bed. "Lara?" The panic in his voice made me jump. "Coming!" I called, wiping furiously at my face. It didn't help. The moment I opened the door, his expression shifted. Something tight and concerned, and the tears came all over again. "I'm sorry," I whispered, swiping at my cheeks. "You don't have to apologise," he said, pulling me into his arms. My breath hitched as I sank into him, warmth wrapping around me before I could stop myself. I shouldn't have. But I did. "I'm taking advantage of you," I choked out with a weak laugh. "I'm not complaining," he shot back, pulling away slightly. "Breakfast?" "Yeah... sure," I nodded, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. I was definitely not avoiding his eyes. We stayed quiet as we walked downstairs. But silence didn't mean peace. Not when Lucian was still holding my hand like it belonged there. My heart wouldn't slow, and I was so busy trying to steady myself that I nearly walked into him when he suddenly stopped. "So," he said, turning to face me, "I'm just going to say what I think, then we move on, okay?" "Okay..." I said warily. He studied me for a moment. "You're gorgeous, Lara. Any man would be insane not to want you." It should have felt like a compliment. Instead, it reminded me exactly who didn't want me. "Thank you," I muttered, starting to walk past him. He didn't move. "What?" I asked. "You don't believe me," he said. I let out a breath. "My husband of five years just proved otherwise." "Liam's an i***t," Lucian said, his voice edged with anger. It startled me. And somehow... it steadied me too. "Have you heard anything from the hospital?" I asked, perched on a stool in his massive kitchen. Yeah. I was absolutely a glutton for punishment. He didn't answer immediately. His grip tightened around the mug in his hand instead. "I'm fine, Lucian," I said lightly. "I'm not going to break." It was a lie. And we both knew it. "She was born last night. Healthy," he said at last. Brief. Controlled. I nodded, staring down at my hands. "Thank you." I didn't trust my voice enough to say more. I felt his gaze on me. "I'm supposed to see her this morning." Of course he did. He was the uncle after all. And he'd be great for her. I'd always known that for my kids. My throat tightened. "So why are you still here? Go." "I needed to make sure you're okay," he said simply. That undid me. Tears slipped down my cheeks before I could stop them. Because he shouldn't have been the one saying that to me. Not him. Not when he wasn't mine. "Damn it, Lara," he muttered, stepping closer. "I didn't mean—" "I'm fine," I cut in quickly, lifting a hand between us. I couldn't let him touch me. Not again. Because if he did... I wouldn't hold together. "I'm just being ridiculous," I whispered. His hands tightened at his sides. Then, without a word, he turned back to the stove, jaw locked as he resumed making breakfast. "I'll be out of your hair once I find an apartment," I said quietly, not looking up. Silence followed. I finally looked up. Lucian was staring at me. Expression unreadable. "It's already morning," I added with a small shrug. "I'm not kicking you out, Lara," he bit out. "You can stay as long as you want." As long as you want. I let out a dry laugh. "I don't want to impose—" He moved before I finished. One moment he was across the room. The next, he was in front of me. Too close. "How many times do I have to say it," he said lowly. "I want you here." My breath caught. "You're his brother, Lucian—" "Damn that," he snapped, eyes darkening. "Liam doesn't get to decide anything about me." "It doesn't change anything," I said quietly. He dragged a hand through his hair, jaw tightening. "Fine," he said finally, voice rough around the edges. But he didn't move away. He didn't look at me when he spoke again. "Eat something, Lara."