Chapter 8: Get Out

The delivery man panicked. He yanked his pants up hard, almost tore the zipper, and bolted past Ethan. He nearly tripped on the edge of the rug. His shirt was still in his hand. He did not look back. His footsteps slammed down the hallway. The front door opened and then slammed shut so hard the sound echoed through the whole mansion. Then it was only the two of us. I stood naked in the middle of the bedroom. My thighs were still wet. My p***y still felt open and used. The air felt cold on my skin. Ethan stayed near the doorway. He had not moved any closer after that one step. His face stayed calm, but his eyes were hard. I tried to speak first. “Ethan, please. Let me explain.” He did not answer. He just looked at me. I took a small step forward. My legs felt weak. “It was a mistake. A one-time thing. I was alone. I was watching old videos. I… I lost control. I know how it looks. I know what you saw. But it doesn’t mean I don’t love you.” His voice came out low and flat. “You were bent over our bed. A stranger’s c**k was inside you. You looked at me and you didn’t stop. You kept taking it. You let him keep going even while I stood here watching. What audacity Riley.” My face burned. “I froze. I didn’t know what to do.” “You didn’t freeze,” he said. “You kept pushing back on him. I saw it. Your body wanted it more than it has ever wanted me.” I wrapped my arms around myself. It did nothing. “That’s not fair. You know you never last. You finish in minutes and then you sleep. I beg you. I cry. You tell me to manage. What am I supposed to do with that?” He laughed once. It was not a real laugh. “So this is my fault? Because I can’t f**k you like a porn star, you bring a delivery man into our bedroom in the middle of the day and f**k him?” “I didn’t plan it!” “I'm pretty sure, You opened the door in a towel. You asked him to come inside. You dropped the towel. You got on your knees and sucked his c**k. Then you bent over and told him to f**k you harder than I ever did. That is not an accident, Riley.” My throat tightened. Tears started. “I was starving. My body was starving. The toys I used to make up what you couldn't give me are not enough. You’re not enough. I try every night to be happy with what you give me but I just can’t.” He took another step into the room. “You made vows. You stood in front of people and said you would be faithful. You changed your face. You dyed your hair. You told me the old Riley was gone. And then the first time a hard c**k shows up at the door, you open your legs for it?” “That’s not true. I’ve been fighting this for months.” “Fighting?” His voice rose for the first time. “Don't even make this into something pitiful for yourself.” I started crying harder. “I needed to feel full. Just once. You don’t understand what it’s like. My body remembers things yours never gave me.” “I understand exactly what it looks like,” he said. “It looks like my wife is cheating on me while I was working hard for the family and then trying to blame me for it.” Anger mixed with shame. “You make me feel broken! Every time you finish early and roll over, I feel like I’m the problem. Like something is wrong with me for wanting more. You said you accepted my past. You said you wanted the real me. The real me needs more than five minutes and a soft apology.” He stared at me. “The real you is the one who just let another man come inside our home and use her while her husband stood in the doorway.” “He didn’t c*m,” I said, stupidly, like that made any difference. “He was about to. And you were about to c*m on his c**k while looking me in the eyes.” I wiped my face with the back of my hand. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Please. We can fix this. I’ll do anything. Therapy. Whatever you want. Just don’t look at me like that.” He shook his head slowly. “I walked in on you. I watched you take him. I watched your p***y grip him. I watched you enjoy it. There is no fixing that picture in my head.” “Ethan—” “You brought a stranger into our bedroom. You were wet and open and begging for harder while I was still at work. You looked at me and kept going. That is not a weakness. That is who you are.” My voice broke. “Don’t say that.” “It’s the truth. The girl I married was supposed to be done with that life. You’re not done. You never were.” I stepped closer, still naked, still shaking. “Please don’t do this. I love you. I chose you. I left everything for you.” “You left the cameras,” he said. “You never left the hunger.” I dropped to my knees on the floor in front of him. I did not care how it looked. “I’m begging you. Give me another chance. I’ll never do it again. I’ll throw the toys away. I’ll stop watching the old videos. Just don’t send me away. I will control the urge, please. I promise.” He looked down at me. His face stayed cold. “Get up.” I stayed on my knees. “Please.” “Get up, Riley.” I stood. Tears ran down my cheeks and dripped onto my chest. My whole body felt exposed and dirty. He spoke the next words slowly, like he had already decided on them a long time ago. “Get out of my house. Tonight.”