I had another weird dream that night, but it was something new and very, very different. Coach Perrine and I were at the Olympics. s****l Olympics, that is. We were on the floor mats, really putting on a show.
We had gone through the mandatory portions of the program, of course. We'd nailed the doggy, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, and missionary positions. We had transitioned seamlessly from the reverse butterfly into the standing mad scientist, and slid back into the paired flounders. Then we rolled into the mated box trolls, flipped into the angry hummingbird, and we were in the home stretch in this industrial cookie press position.
"That f*****g Russian judge is killing me!" Coach Perrine hissed into my ear, "the way she keeps glaring at me and shaking her head...I want to kick her ass!"
