After turning it over and over in my head until dawn was stained violet, I decided to do nothing. What was the point of getting upset?
Upsetting Alexander, upsetting the children…
I spent the hours awake, deliberately mentalizing myself about how to continue, trying to reach a conclusion that might or might not mix nobility on my part and a bit of selfishness. I couldn’t blame anyone for anything; it was already clear that we had reached this point because of the most extraordinary coincidence. But I could feel guilty admitting that, evidently, something about that man attracted me.
I thought about everything that was happening, about what had happened to him, and I felt bad; because while we tried to do everything possible to keep his children safe, a part of me took pleasure in notici
