And that was my mistake (or perhaps the greatest success for the moment); I opened my eyes suddenly, shaken by the pain that ran down my entire spine, reminding me of two things: one, that I had fallen very recently, and two, that I couldn’t end up in bed with him because I was menstruating.
“Alexander… Alexander, please, no…” I had to stop him, we were moving too fast.
And I wasn’t in a condition to receive him, no matter how much I desired it. Other things came to my mind in that embarrassing instant. I hadn’t shaved or bathed yet; I wanted… I wanted to receive him in a special way when it happened. It wasn’t just about my period. As strange as it may seem, I had never fantasized like this about him, and I had never felt the need to be “prepared” for anything. It hurt just to place my
