Lacey's P.O.V.
"So, this is Christmas and who have you done? another year over and no one has made me c*m and so this is Christmas, I wished I'd had fun, the rear and the front fun, the S and the M"
"Really, Abigail?"
"And so this is Christmas, for big and for strong men, Santa please send me one, It's been so freaking long and so happy Christmas, I've had some black and some white, my pink and my purple dildos, have kept me up all night"
Abigail continues to sing while I laugh at her stupid made-up lyrics.
"You're lucky the kids aren't here, Abigail, otherwise I'd string you up"
"Why? John Lennon's Christmas song is a classic one"
"Yeah, when you sing the correct lyrics, Abigail"
I say sounding stumped.
"I think John Lennon would be turning in his grave if he heard your dirty lyr
